Category: LOL!!!!


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Different types of slap – Abeg no try am with anybody

(1) TAKE AWAY SLAP:- When a girl gives you a dirty slap, and all you can do is hold your face and walk away..that is take away slap.

(2) RESOUNDING SLAP:- That is when after you are hit. You keep on hearing..some funny sounds in your brain like wiiiiiiiiiii!
READ MORE AFTER THE CUT

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Top 15 Patience Jonathan’s English Blunders Please Read:

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.1. My husband and Sambo is a good people (Imagine)
2. The President was once a child
and the senators were once a
children.
3. My fellow widows.(Is her husband
dead?)
4. A good mother takes
care of hischildren.(His
children? Like Seriously?)
5. The people sitting before
youwere once a children.
(Smh)

6. Yes we are all happy
for the effort, it is not easy
to carry second in
an international competition
like this one,(addressing
press men after Female
Under-19 FIFAWorld Cup).
7. The bombers who born them?
Wasn’t it not a woman?
Theywere once a children now
a adult now they are bombing
women and children making
some children a widow.(Is she
a literate?)
8. My heart feels
sorry for these children who
have become widows
for loosing their parents for
one reason or another.
(Lmfao….)
9. We should have
love for our fellowNigerians
irrespective of their
NATIONALITY(Lwkmd)
10. Thank God the Doctors and Nurses
are responding to treatment.
(Doctors and nurses?)
11. I would rather kill myself
instead ofcommitting suicide.
(What’s the difference?)
12.
Ojukwu is a great man, he died
but his manhood lives on.
(Manhood?)
13. On behalf of
2million, I donate my family.
(Laugh wan tear my belle o)
14. Why will bokharam
bomb last churches on
christmas day, theydon’t
have respect for Jesus, they
are a very bad person,infact
I’m a sadder woman right now
and Mr.President ismore
saddest(Sad,sad
der,saddest…)
15. We all have
HIV.( For real? Imagine this
woman o, Chei!!!.

What Is Wrong With This Photo?

The man is tapping current!!! 


The scene above was captured at the wake-keeping ceremony of late Rev Vincentia Aribe in New Jersey recently.
The above two reverend sisters were spotted rocking the dance floor as the MC of the event changed the music to P-Square ‘s hit song ‘ Chop My Money ‘.
The Rev. sisters got carried away by the music without considering the fact that they’re being captured.
Loves their swag! They no send people….

Meet Obamadon! Newly Discovered Lizard Named After Obama

Researchers have named a newly discovered, prehistoric lizard “Obamadon gracilis” in honor of the 44th president’s toothy grin. 

The small, insect-eating lizard was first discovered in eastern Montana in 1974, but a recent re-examination showed the fossil had been wrongly classified as a Leptochamops denticulatus and was in fact a new species, researchers told Reuters on Tuesday.
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Some Crazy Facts About African Girls

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* 90% of Ugandan chicks/girls have aborted a minimum of 5 times before their final year.
* Only 20% of campus girls in all African countries are virgins.
* 60% of Nigerian girls can open their legs for you if you offer them just airtime.
* 82% of Somali chicks/girls don’t wear panties
* 77% of Zambia chicks/girls have never seen a BB before.
* 96 of Zimbabwe babes wear one pant for one week.
* 79% of Botswana chicks have orgasms as soon as they hear gun shots.
* 98% of South African chicks have hair in their chests and chests.
* 80% of Sudan chicks carry their panties in their handbag cos they dont know where whey will spend the night.
* 90% of Burundi chicks look like Weird MC
* 71% of Tanzanian chicks wear second hand panties.
* 67% of Rwandan babes howl like witches during sex.
* 74% of Ugandan chicks guzzle sperm like cold beer.

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It’s a photo that will enrage hard-working football fans across Britain.
West Brom defender Liam Ridgewell, 28, squats over a toilet and wipes his backside with a wad of £20 notes. Scattered on the floor in front of him are dozens more £20 notes, totalling almost £1,000.


The Premier League star, who earns at least £20,000 a week, is apparently using the cash instead of toilet roll. He claims the sick stunt was simply a “joke” to wind up a friend — but it will infuriate more than just his pal.
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Saudi Arabia implements electronic tracking system for women


“Why don’t we just install a microchip into our women to track them around?” joked another.
“If I need an SMS to let me know my wife is leaving Saudi Arabia, then I’m either married to the wrong woman or need a psychiatrist,” tweeted Hisham.
“This is technology used to serve backwardness in order to keep women imprisoned,” said Bishr, the columnist.
“It would have been better for the government to busy itself with finding a solution for women subjected to domestic violence” than track their movements into and out of the country.

Franziska, 33 from Germany, who weighs nine stone is accused of ‘attempted manslaughter with a weapon’ after her 13-stone boyfriend claimed she tried to smother him with her bréasts and pretend it was a séx game.

She denies the claim saying it was a séx game and he knew what it was all about. Continue reading

Annoying Question Females Ask And their Answer!! 
1]. Are U a player? *Yes REALMADRID FC wants TO sign
me next season* do dey expect U 2 say yes?

2].why do U wan’t my Pin ?? want to use it to burst
balloon.
3]. Can U die 4 me? My name is surely not Romeo
4]. My Bis will soon expire, what am i going to do? return
the BB to the seller and get a Nokia 3310
5]. If I sleep over in your Place, hope Nothing funny will
happen? No, trust me we would just perform night vigil
6]. Hope U won’t break my Heart? If u don’t put it at the
edge of the table…
7]. Can U take me out? sorry are U in prison?
8]. Pls come and pick me.. like say she be beans.
9]. I think ave missed my period.. then ask the class
captain for the next class!!!
10.] Can’t you get a Car? Shey your Papa get Car when
him dey Higher Institution? Lmyo

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